If 2009 taught me anything at all about living right, it was that my sense of priorities could use a little tweaking. As a community, we’ve been forced to reassess what we truly believe is important, and many of us (the smarter ones, at least) have recognized that it has nothing to do with amassing “things” that we can’t even afford to maintain. So, after much soul searching, I’ve compiled a list of the five things that I believe will guarantee you a richer, more meaningful life in 2010.
1. Find Your Tribe.
Your people are out there waiting. Go find them. These are your future friends for life that are passionate about the same issues, who like the same BBQ joint that you like, and who drink beer at the same tavern on game days. Thanks to explosive nature of new media, you can now attract like-minded souls by starting a blog, creating a Facebook Fan Page, joining a local Meetup group, or tweeting to your heart’s content about the very things that make your life worth living. And the best thing about “finding your tribe,” besides it being free, is that, all the while, you will be building a platform of content and creating a personalized brand for yourself that people will not only relate to, but will believe in and follow. Go be yourself, and people will love you for it.
2. Lose the Agenda, Already.
People can smell “agenda” a mile away when you enter into anything with a “what’s in it for me” attitude. Plain and simple, if you’re going to maintain quality relationships with people you do business with, you’re going have to resist becoming attached to the outcome of your good deeds. In many cases, there may not be any reciprocation (or even acknowledgement) of things you’ve done for others, but don’t let this dissuade you from being a decent human being. This can be as easy as a hand-written note to a client or a pot of chicken soup for a sick neighbor. How much would it hurt (or help?) you to do something nice just for the sake of being nice, without forming expectations of what you’ll get in return? In the end, someone who is authentic and who genuinely cares about the people around them will reap the most rewards, both personally and professionally, period. So stop keeping score.
3. Be Your Own Best Friend (For Once)
For supposedly logical creatures, we do some stupid, backwards things. We wait until our houses are about to be sold to strangers before we landscape the front yard and add details that, while we actually lived in the house, were neglected. We use this upside down logic on ourselves as well when we refuse to live life to the fullest until other people get involved. We get into shape only when there’s a reunion coming up. We deny ourselves a decent suit until we have an interview or a funeral. We deny ourselves a soothing spa treatment until everyone else in the house is taken care of and there’s still money left over in the account. There’s nothing noble about neglecting your own needs, and there’s nothing selfish about putting yourself first once in a while. By respecting and taking care of yourself, you project the uncompromising message to the world that you’re worth respecting. Be your own best friend, and I promise that you’ll be in a better place to take care of others.
4. Go Where Everybody Knows Your Name (and They’re Always Glad You Came)
There’s a certain dignity in belonging to something that is bigger than the sum of its parts. When you immerse yourself in your community and commit yourself to buying local, you enter into an environment that, by its very nature, looks after its own. Pick a place that you love nearby, a bookstore, a restaurant, and a coffee shop, and become its loyal advocate. Introduce yourself to the owners, refer friends there on Facebook, and most importantly, show up there to support it financially. Become a regular to a place where everyone greets you by name and already knows how you take your coffee. It’s one of the single most satisfying realities that a person can achieve in a world that, in so many ways, has done its best to keep you anonymous.
5. Turn off the bleeping television.
In the words of Gary Vaynerchuk, “quit watching *&%$ Lost.” How many hours of 2010 are you going to invest in gawking at someone else’s life, someone else’s story, when you should be out there in the world living your own? Do anything. Go take a walk in the woods. Go call a friend. Go do something that makes you so happy that you almost can’t stand it. Go do the very thing that you’re always making the excuses that you can’t do because you “don’t have time.” Now is your time, and it’s the only time you’ve got left. Put down the remote control and go be the hero in your own life.
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